Bear Attacks Man 4 Salami Sandwhich

At the tip of that accusing finger above, the headline reads:

New Jersey Man is Attacked By Bear Over Salami Sandwhich

This is news? Sun melts ice cube left in the sun. Is that news? It was the front page of yahoo on july 4th, my birthday.

I am sick of  these diversionary tactics taken by the media; There are more important things to be covered in the news. This bear story took up space that could have been devoted to a Michael Jackson story. We were robbed, now we will never know what his last thoughts were on, well, I don’t know, something like, maybe, bear attacks.

Well, I bet he was PRO bear attacks.

On Your Shelf

In the past I worked with Improv Everywhere, a group that has gained notoriety for pulling pranks on the public without a reveal. Charlie Todd, the groups inventor, has a new book out: Causing a Scene: Extraordianry Pranks in Ordinary Places with Improv Everywhere.  I read it and not only is a great read, but there are a couple photos and quotes, of and from little ole’ me. So go to Barnes and Noble and pick it up now for a Daniel Berman quote and some very funny, inspiring stories from Charlie.

For your conveniance, embedded below is the prank I talk about in the book. It has been viewed over a million and a half times on Youtube alone.

Also, Pick up this.

It was a crazy night

Crazy Night

Urban Farm.

Slicker Backed Hair

Slicked back hair.

Danny Berman with Public Enemy Shirt On: Headshot: Old School

Horny Pig

The last few entries have been a wee bit on the heavy side. Thoughts and thanks and wishes and… more. In the last post I told ya (warned ya) that the next post would be more light hearted, probably have something to do with elephant testicles or some other kind of levity. Well, while no elephant testes are in this new series I wrote for the really fun website xtranormal.com (you should write one), it does have to do with a horny pig.

Here is episode 1. Enjoy . I may add a few more installments to this entry soon. Those will somehow involve the scrotum of a pachyderm… don’t you fret. And Happy New Year!

Edited to add…. episode two of Horny Pig called: Horny Pig Episode Two
Horny Pig, forced out of his old neighborhood moves into a new home. Ps. I delivered on promise above with this one.

Edited to add— speaking of Horny Pig, here is a small video that website Animoto.com threw together of a night working coatcheck on Halloween this past year. Place to Bury Strangers accompanies slide show.

A needle of cynicism, a thick thread of sincerity

Well. I am thankful, grateful, fortunate, and ecstatic. If you asked me two years ago where or who’d I be today, I would have not have guessed disease free or dare I say healthy. After moving so much in such a short period of time, I would not say I would be living where or how I do.  I am thankful for my family and friends. I am thankful my brothers fire in his apartment didn’t take my brother in its wake, I am thankful that my folks and grandmother are healthy. I am thankful, that you my reader allow me, the dark humored, silly misenthrope to be sappy and earnest every 17th blog. Don’t worry the next blog entry will certainly have something to do with elephant testicles, but this one is to say thanks. To say happy thanksgiving.

This holiday like most American holidays is founded on the awful truth that America is rooted in bullying, failing to tip off our compatriots that they have corn stuck in their teeth, extreme over indulgence, and mass commercialism. For a while, I thought that black friday was a catholic holiday that just happened to coincide with 80% off at Bed Bath and Beyond or 30% off at Tits, Tits and Bras.

But,  I digress and divert away from the real reason for this post.  It has been an amazing, life altering, healthy year, filled with recovery, creative, fulfilling projects, running, reading, writing, and working towards and making headway on new and focused goals. New body, new burrogh, new habits, new apartment, new roommates, president w. bush is finally moving in with me in a couple of months , same great family and friends and with that… happy thanksgiving.

More Everything Coming

I fell in love with my drawing on college ruled paper. we are getting married in the spring. While I don’t like to kiss and tell, we HAVE gotten intimate and the paper cuts are killing me. More everything coming soon.

My fight with a subway vagrant led to a standing ovation AND just won me a Mental Floss Contest!

Thanks Mental Floss, but I am no hero. Just a man.

The good people over at Mentalfloss.com held a subway story contest yesterday and I won. They are giving me a new copy of their yet to be released book, Mental Floss History of the World.

Umm, yes! I wrote of me sparring with a religious man. The story involves zombies and jesus and yelling and clapping. Sorry, this one is void of nudity. Read my winning entry yourself.

Also, here are some unrelated cool pictures. More posts on their way. I know the difference between frequent and regular.  This blog is neither.

That looks like a comfy sweater. My brothers cat would love it.

My brothers cat would love this one more. SOMEtimes if you puff out your chest and think of heavy things like anvils, even if you are tiny, you can scare off someone or something bigger. I had one of these strapped on during my subway story.

Also, a shout to Pravina for giving my www.danieldannydan.com blog props on her site, ‘One Day I will Sleep, And Sleep Deeply. She is a fun writer herself.

Tomi Fujiyama: Talented Japanese Honky-Tonk Country Singer

Hello all -

I am staying busy here in the city. Wearing a bunch of hats these days (acting,writing, producing, fedora, top, beret, yarmulke, dunce).  Trying to do what is in my control.As an actor, I had booked 2 commercials only to have them both fall apart today. Feeling pretty awesome right now (sound of wrist slitting. sound of antiseptic and band-aid going on cut. sound of banging head on wall) Oh well… next time… or perhaps the time after that… persistence and hard work… we’ll see where that gets us…

As a producer, I am associate Producer on a film that is currently under production… here is the press release and if you can make it to Pianos this Thursday, September 11th… please do. It should be a highly emotional night with some amazing talent performing. BYE!

Daniel Danny Dan

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

“JAPANESE COWGIRL” RETURNS TO THE U.S. STAGE AFTER 40 YEAR ABSENCE

Played with Johnny Cash at the Grand Ole Opry and now she is back for seconds four decades later

New York City, NY – September 9, 2008 – Tomi Fujiyama’s amazing career and tale, which spans two hemispheres and half a century, is being made into a feature length documentary film, MADE IN JAPAN, with narration by actor Elijah Wood. The seventy-year-old musician will hold her first American concert in over four decades on September 11th, 2008 at Pianos on the Lower East Side, New York City. Opening acts include the popular Bluegrass band All Night Cookin’ at 8PM and the indie/alt country rock band The Musical Outfits at 9PM. Tomi Fujiyama will take the stage at 10PM. The performance will be recorded and included in the upcoming film. Fujiyama is to perform additional dates in Las Vegas and while nothing has been set in stone, Tomi is traveling to Nashville to fulfill her American Dream and establish a legendary 50-year career by playing one final time on the Grand Ole Opry stage.

In 1951, the beginning of her long career, Fujiyama was twelve years old and couldn’t speak a word of English. At that age, she switched from performing traditional Japanese songs for small Japanese audiences to singing Country/ Western for the American. In the years following, the talented musician recorded 21 singles and 5 albums with Columbia Records. One of which, recorded in Nashville with Country legend Bill Anderson, sold more than 50,000 copies and led to much American press and to performances on the American television programs, The Les Crane Show and The Danny Thomas Show. Tomi was 21 years old when she was discovered at The Mint Hotel in Las Vegas where she had a backbreaking 4-shows-a-night, 7 days a week contract.

In 1964, Tomi Fujiyama was asked to perform at The Grand Ole Opry’s 39th Birthday Extravaganza in Nashville,Tennessee. She took the stage after Johnny Cash and received the only standing ovation of the 5-hour show. Less than one year later she was  forced to return to her native Japan to fulfill contractual obligations with Columbia records and to care for ailing parents.

After returning home to Japan in 1965, Tomi continued to play the U.S.O. throughout the 1980’s. This included going on U.S.O tours of Vietnam and South East Asia during the Vietnam War. Still going strong in the 1990’s, her management company Columbia Records produced a “Best Of”  album in 1992.  In 1996 she recorded “Lonely Together” in Nashville, Tennessee. Fujiyama returned to Nashville in 2003 to record her first album in 30 years: “Gold”.

Today Fujiyama continues to perform in clubs and venues all over Japan where her passion for music and her lust for life continues to move and inspire. She has dreamt of returning to the Opry again one day and that day is approaching soon. That is after all her 1 goal in life!

Ms. Fujiyama’s first American show in over forty years is scheduled for PIANOS(http://www.pianosnyc.com), the popular Lower East Side music venue. Thursday, September 11, 2008 at 8PM with NYC bluegrass band All Night Cookin’, the indie/alt country rock band The Musical Outfits at 9PM and Tomi Fujiyama will take the stage at 10PM. Tomi will be interviewed by Laura Cantrell on WMFU 91.1’s long running Country music program, Radio Thrift Shop, on the morning of September 9th.

FOR PRESS PASSES AND/OR INQUIRIES ON THIS FILM AND TOUR (SPECIFY WHICH), PLEASE CONTACT:

DANIEL BERMAN
TOO MUCH HAPPINESS, LLC
T: 
E: DANIEL.BERMAN(AT)YAHOO.COM

TRAILER:
http://www.youtube.com/tomifujiyama

–
Daniel Berman